07 February 2011

Truth be told: No one knows you when you're down & out.

You guys, I'm still on this kayak.
And I don't even know why anymore.  Everything about being here is destructive--I'm still drowning, still searching for a life vest, still hoping the kayak proves itself worthy of this suffering.
So far it's not looking too good for me.
But, in the process of drowning, I've discovered something amazing: The people that stick by you, or come out of nowhere to throw you a rope, and the ones that bail on you are not who I ever could have expected.
I'm not here to say that I've been the most fun person to be around these last few waterlogged months.  I'm not here to say that I would be the type of person to put up with someone like myself for the past...what? I've been here for almost a year now (give or take).  But it's amazing how the people who I used to trust my deepest thoughts with, the ones I used to let in so deep, they just up and left me here.
And I am so blessed to have the ones who entered so quickly to fill their place.  I mean, out of nowhere these people entered and helped pick me up and get me to shore.  And they are in their own sinking vessels.  And even though I know I said I'm still here, sinking in this shitty kayak, they are there in theirs, and I think I'll be okay from this fact alone.
What I wanted to say and achieve by this post is this: people are unpredictable.  And even though this is titled, "No one knows you when you're down and out" I meant to say "not a lot of people know you when you're down and out".  And that select few, the fellow sufferers of this disease we call love sick and heartache, are the ones that make all the difference.

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